Evening showtime, meet-and-greet line, back of the venue
It started innocently enough. The venue had arranged a post-show meet-and-greet for fans who had splurged on VIP passes. Gabriel was still buzzing from his final solo and riding the caffeine high of two pre-show espresso shots and one disturbingly chunky energy drink labeled “Thermonuclear Howl.”
He was the first to take a seat at the folding table set up near the back of the venue. Mark and Thane followed, both clearly Not Having It™.
Then the first fan walked in.
Wearing ears. Sparkly pink werewolf ears. And a tail. That wagged.
Thane froze. Mark’s pupils shrank to pinpricks.
Gabriel blinked, looked left, looked right, and whispered, “Oh no.”
The next fan wore a hand-sewn hoodie with fur glued to the sleeves and what appeared to be actual meat bones dangling from the drawstrings. She growled theatrically and purred, “You guys awakened my inner beast.”
Mark made a face like he’d just bit into a hot dog and discovered a thumb.
Rico, already half-laughing behind a merch crate, whispered to Maya, “Ten bucks says Thane goes full aneurysm before this is over.”
Maya rolled her eyes. “I’m not betting on inevitability.”
Then came the real kicker.
A teenage fan—maybe seventeen—wearing a glittery silver cape, mismatched claw gloves, and makeup that made him look like a raccoon who’d been mugged. He proudly declared:
“I’m FERAL THANE.”
There was a beat of silence. Even Gabriel’s smile twitched.
“Excuse me?” Thane asked slowly, standing just a little taller.
“I made a whole OC based on you!” the fan beamed. “He’s, like, part arctic wolf, but also part dragon and his fur smells like—”
“Stop.”
The fan blinked. “Huh?”
Mark leaned forward, voice like a glacier scraping across asphalt. “Go home. Reconsider your life.”
The fan slunk away.
Then someone showed up with a shirtless Gabriel cosplay and a Sharpie, asking to “sign my chest like the alpha you are.”
Gabriel did it.
Thane looked like he wanted to throw himself into the nearest bass amp.
“You’re enabling them,” he hissed under his breath.
Gabriel just sipped his coffee and grinned, “I’m living my best life.”
Another fan waddled up in a onesie with painted abs, fangs made of Tic-Tacs, and a “Team Mark” pin.
Mark didn’t blink. “Get therapy.”
Behind the line, Jonah was filming everything.
Rico whispered, “I’m gonna meme the shit outta this.”
Maya just laughed and leaned on the wall. “We knew what this band was when we joined.”
Thane finally stood, hands flat on the table. “Okay. I am calling an emergency band meeting right now. This is not sustainable.”
Gabriel sipped his drink with a contented sigh. “You love it.”
“I don’t!”
“You love it.”
Mark stood next to Thane, arms crossed. “We’re burning the internet down after this.”
“Good.”
Meanwhile, another fan posed for a photo with Gabriel while holding a handmade sign that read: “I HOWL FOR COFFEE AND CHAOS”
Thane turned and muttered, “That one might be our target demo.”
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