{"id":300,"date":"2023-06-05T01:00:56","date_gmt":"2023-06-05T06:00:56","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/threewerewolves.com\/?p=300"},"modified":"2024-02-10T10:23:15","modified_gmt":"2024-02-10T16:23:15","slug":"soundcheck-or-shellshock","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/threewerewolves.com\/tourblog\/soundcheck-or-shellshock\/","title":{"rendered":"Soundcheck or Shellshock?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>The moment Gabriel set foot on the stage\u2014a spray-painted plywood riser with \u201cRock It, Cletus!\u201d still faintly visible beneath the black paint\u2014his clawed foot stuck to something.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cEither that\u2019s a stage booger,\u201d he muttered, \u201cor crawfish juice is way more adhesive than I expected.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Cassie pointed to the stage-left monitor. \u201cWhy is that wedge covered in duct tape that says \u2018DO NOT SING HERE\u2019?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Thane checked the patch bay and grimaced. \u201cBecause if you do, it feeds back so hard it calls the dead.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Jonah was crawling under his drum setup\u2014wedged between what looked like a folding table and a fake cactus\u2014to figure out why one of his toms was wobbling like a nervous chihuahua.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cUh\u2026 guys?\u201d he called. \u201cThere\u2019s a mouse. Just\u2026 chillin\u2019 in the kick drum. I think it\u2019s judging me.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Mark was high up on a shaky scissor lift made from an unholy mix of rebar, rust, and prayer. He had managed to secure two surviving VL2Bs to the flimsy truss overhead.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cDon\u2019t bump the fogger,\u201d he called through comms. \u201cIt\u2019s directly wired into the breaker for the snack bar. Again.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Maya let out a full-body sigh and glared at her mic stand, which had all the stability of a Jenga tower in an earthquake. \u201cIf this collapses mid-set again, I swear on every string I\u2019ve ever broken, I will eat it.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Gabriel was mid\u2013bass thrum when one of the fluorescent lights above them fizzled, sparked, and then flickered back to life\u2014revealing that the venue ceiling still had disco balls from the skating rink days\u2026 and possibly a squirrel nest.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Cassie laughed. \u201cThis is either gonna be the best show we\u2019ve ever played or a paranormal crime scene.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Thane barked into comms, \u201cLet\u2019s get it over with. Line check. Pray to whatever gods are listening.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity\"\/>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Five minutes into soundcheck:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Maya\u2019s strap broke and she <em>did<\/em> try to play with her teeth.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Gabriel tripped over an extension cord and almost took out a full speaker tower.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Rico knocked over a paper crawfish mascot that somehow burst into flames.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Jonah\u2019s snare stand collapsed and the mouse retreated, unimpressed.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Cassie shredded her throat trying to sing over the venue&#8217;s popcorn machine whine.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>The lighting rig shorted during the fog test, cutting power to the bouncy house next door\u2014mid-birthday party.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>Mark, from his post near the breaker box, sighed. \u201cCongratulations. We\u2019ve broken everything. Including childhood.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Thane slowly lowered his headset mic. \u201cI\u2019m starting to miss the birthday party gig.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Gabriel, sweat-soaked, claws covered in stage grime, looked up and grinned. \u201cStill better than Tulsa.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The band collectively agreed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Even the mouse seemed to nod.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The moment Gabriel set foot on the stage\u2014a spray-painted plywood riser with \u201cRock It, Cletus!\u201d still faintly visible beneath the black paint\u2014his clawed foot stuck to something. \u201cEither that\u2019s a stage booger,\u201d he muttered, \u201cor crawfish juice is way more adhesive than I expected.\u201d Cassie pointed to the stage-left monitor. \u201cWhy is that wedge covered [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-300","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-tour-life"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/threewerewolves.com\/tourblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/300","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/threewerewolves.com\/tourblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/threewerewolves.com\/tourblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/threewerewolves.com\/tourblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/threewerewolves.com\/tourblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=300"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/threewerewolves.com\/tourblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/300\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3255,"href":"https:\/\/threewerewolves.com\/tourblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/300\/revisions\/3255"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/threewerewolves.com\/tourblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=300"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/threewerewolves.com\/tourblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=300"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/threewerewolves.com\/tourblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=300"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}